The Sober
Curious
Traveler's
Guide

Hi love,

If you're reading this, something inside you is already shifting.

Maybe you've started questioning your relationship with alcohol. Maybe you're sober curious and looking at a summer of travel coming up and wondering how to do it without the wine, the cocktails, the resort drinks running the show. Maybe you're already sober and just looking for tips. Maybe you're trying to cut back and want to know how to navigate trips differently.

Wherever you are, this guide is for you.

I've been alcohol free for over three years now. In that time I've traveled to France, Italy, Germany, Austria, Denmark, the UK, Scotland, Colombia, Peru, Mexico, and all across the US — LA, New York, Miami, Aspen, Vail, Austin, Hawaii, South Carolina. Solo trips. Group trips. Romantic trips. Family trips. Every single one of them better than any trip I took when I was drinking.

This guide is everything I've learned. The mindset shifts. The practical scripts. The mocktail orders. The gentle ways to handle the pressure that absolutely exists when you're traveling without alcohol in a culture that drinks.

You don't have to figure this out alone. And you don't have to wait until you're "ready" to start traveling differently. The next trip you take can be the one that shows you what's actually possible.

If you want to learn more about my story and how I got here, you can read more about me here.

Before we get practical, we have to talk about the lie

The lie says alcohol is what makes travel fun. That you can't really experience Italy without the wine. That girls trips require getting wasted. That all-inclusives are only worth it if you're drinking your weight in piña coladas.

The lie is everywhere. It's in the marketing, the movies, the Instagram captions, the way everyone you've ever traveled with talks about their trips.

But here's the truth.

You wake up earlier. You see more. You eat better. You remember the conversations. You feel the place you're in. You come home rested instead of wrecked.

The first trip without alcohol might feel weird because you've been told your whole life that travel and drinking are the same thing. Give it 48 hours. Your body will catch up. Your brain will catch up. And by day three you'll be wondering why you ever did it any other way.

One mindset shift to take with you everywhere: You're not missing out by not drinking. You're missing out by not being fully present for the experience.

The airport is a trap

The airport is where the trip starts. Whatever you do there sets the tone for everything that follows.

Bars at every gate. "Vacation starts now!" mimosa signs. The cultural script that says you should grab a drink to "loosen up" before your flight.

Here's what to do instead.

Before you leave home, decide

Don't make the call when you're standing at the gate watching everyone else order. Decide in your kitchen before you leave for the airport that you're not drinking at the airport. Done.

Eat a real meal before you go

Hangry plus tired plus airport plus bars everywhere equals a recipe for ordering a drink because everyone else is. Eat first.

At your gate, grab one of these

• Sparkling water with limeFrom any sit-down restaurant. Universal.
• A kombuchaMost airports stock them now.
• An NA beer or mocktailMore airports are stocking these every year. Bonus points if it comes in a cute can.
• A really good coffee or matchaEspecially for morning flights.

In the air

Hydrate hard. Travel makes you dehydrated, alcohol makes it 10x worse. Liquid IV is your friend.

Bring something to do that isn't drinking. A book, a podcast, a journal, a downloaded show.

If a flight attendant offers you wine, "no thank you" is a complete sentence.

Arrive prepared, rested, fed, and hydrated. Your whole trip levels up.

Your universal ordering playbook

This used to be my biggest fear about traveling sober. What do I order? How do I not feel weird?

The good news: the world has gotten WAY better at this.

Your go-to orders in any country

• Sparkling water with fresh citrusUniversal. Elevated. Looks like a real drink. Works everywhere.
• "Do you have a mocktail menu?"More places do than you think. Most upscale restaurants have at least 2-3 NA options now.
• Tonic + lime + bittersLooks identical to a gin and tonic. Most bars have all three.
• The local fresh juiceIn Italy, ask for spremuta. In Peru, try chicha morada. In Mexico, agua de jamaica. The world has incredible NA local drinks if you ask.
• Espresso or matchaEspecially after dinner. Chic. Cultural. Totally normal abroad.
• Virgin classicsMost bartenders know virgin mojitos, virgin piña coladas, Shirley Temples.

Said with confidence, with a smile, no apology. The waiter or bartender will take it from there. Most of them love this question. It gives them a chance to be creative.

Let's name what's real

The cultural pressure to drink when you're traveling internationally is intense. And nobody talks about this honestly in the sober curious space.

"You're in Italy, you HAVE to have wine."
"You can't go to Mexico and not drink tequila."
"In Peru, pisco is the culture."
"It's basically rude not to drink in France."

I've heard every version. From locals, friends, waiters, tour guides, taxi drivers.

When a local is excited about their culture, they want to share it with you. When someone is drinking, they want you to drink too because it makes them feel less self-conscious. When a waiter recommends wine pairings, they're doing their job.

None of it is personal. And none of it is a real boundary you have to break.

Your move

Warm smile. Confident tone. Lean into curiosity instead of apology.

This works EVERYWHERE. The waiter goes deeper on the menu. The local introduces you to something new. The friend respects you more, not less.

You are not less cultured because you're not drinking. You're more present for the culture you're actually in.

Navigating other people's energy

Group trips sober require a slightly different approach because you're navigating other people's energy on top of your own.

Before the trip

Tell your closest friend going on the trip that you're not drinking. Not in a heavy way, just casually. "Just FYI I'm doing the sober thing on this trip so don't be weirded out by my mocktails." This gives you one person who has your back from day one.

Don't make a big group announcement. You don't owe anyone an explanation in a group chat. Let people notice in real time, in the moment, individually.

Tell the group organizer (this one matters)

If someone else is organizing the trip, send them a private message ahead of time and let them know you're not drinking. This isn't about making it a thing. It's about money.

Nothing will leave a worse taste in your mouth than getting stuck splitting a $400 bar tab at a group dinner when you had a sparkling water. I've been there. It's awkward to bring up in the moment, and most well-meaning friends will just default to splitting evenly because it's easier.

A simple heads up in advance solves it. The organizer will respect you for being direct.

During the trip

Be the activity planner. Sober girls are best at this anyway. Suggest the morning hike, the sunrise beach walk, the cooking class, the spa day. Build the trip around things that aren't centered on drinking.

When everyone is drunk and you're not

You'll be the one who remembers everything tomorrow. You'll be the one who handles the situation when someone gets too drunk. You'll be the one who actually makes it to the morning activity. This is gold. Embrace it.

When to leave the night

Trust your body. When the group has crossed from buzzed-and-fun to drunk-and-messy, you don't have to stay. Going to bed early is one of the great gifts of sober travel.

No one is going to remember when you left. They're going to remember when YOU made the morning hike happen and got the photo at sunrise.

The all-inclusive paradox

All-inclusives are uniquely challenging because the whole business model is "drink as much as you possibly can to get your money's worth."

Here's how to actually thrive at one sober.

1. Order mocktails at every bar.
   The bartenders make them and you should let them. They're often actually delicious because the bartenders are working with fresh ingredients.
2. Use the unused alcohol budget for upgrades.
   Spa treatments. Excursions. Private dinners. A nicer room. Take the money you would have spent on "free" alcohol and put it toward things that actually elevate your trip.
3. Make the most of the early hours.
   Resorts are at their most magical from 6-9am. The beach is empty. The pool is yours. The buffet has just opened. Most people are still passed out from last night. You will feel like you have your own private island.
4. Find your people.
   There's always at least one other person at the resort doing this. Spot the early morning yoga class attendees, the people at the smoothie bar, the ones up early for the snorkel tour. Your people are there.

The most underrated experience a woman can have

Solo travel sober is one of the most powerful experiences I've ever had. And no one talks about it.

You're already alone. You're already navigating a new place. You're already in your own head and your own body in a heightened way. Adding alcohol to that just dulls the most magical part of the experience.

What you actually get

• Real connections with localsSober conversations go deeper. Strangers will tell you things.
• You feel safer in a new cityYour instincts work properly. You make better decisions.
• You sleep better in unfamiliar placesYour nervous system isn't compounded with alcohol stress.
• Spontaneous detours don't backfireYou can take any opportunity that comes up. No regrets.
• You actually remember the tripAnd it changes you when you come home.

Solo trips are made magical by sunrise walks, early coffees in cafes, watching a city wake up. Drinking destroys that. Sober travel gives it back to you.

The myth about intimacy and alcohol

This one might be the deepest one.

There's a myth that says drinking together is what creates intimacy on a vacation. It's not. Real intimacy is created by being fully present with each other.

The candlelit dinner where you actually hear what your partner is saying.

The walk home where you remember every word of the conversation.

The morning after where you both wake up and choose each other again instead of nursing a hangover and snapping at each other.

The first sober trip my fiancé and I took together was to Oaxaca, Mexico. And it was a dream.

Instead of doing a mezcal tasting like every other couple in town, we did a traditional sweat lodge ceremony with a local healer. We sat in the dark with strangers, sweated out things we didn't know we were carrying, and came out of it completely changed. It was one of the most unforgettable experiences of my life.

Drinking activities are so basic. When you focus on real cultural experiences, trips become so much richer. Cooking classes. Ceremonies. Hikes. Hot springs. Museum afternoons. Cafe-hopping. Long walks. Sunrises. Everything alcohol kept you from seeing.

That trip set the standard for what we expect from each other now. We don't have to "loosen up" to be ourselves around each other. We don't have to soften reality to enjoy our time together. We just get to be in it.

If your partner drinks and you don't: have the conversation before the trip, not during. Tell them what you need. Most partners are way more supportive than we expect them to be when we lead with what we actually want.

What I always have on me

Tap any of the categories below to see exactly what's in my travel kit.